Dear Ask Ashlee,
I love your affirmations on your page, I wish I could get more of them. Your voice is soothing and they really help me get through the day sometimes. My question for you is how did you get to a point where you were able to do that? I try to think of different ways to speak about myself but I just get bombarded with negative thoughts and before I know it I am crying or just feeling ridiculous for thinking I could talk my way out of the feeling. Most days I just sit alone with my thoughts and they become overwhelming and other days I feel like I am just on autopilot and doing whatever needs to be done that day. Any advice would be great!
Me
Dear You,
So here’s the thing, be honest how many times have your thoughts, your behaviors or even your emotions been negatively impacted by your own self infliction? Have you ever considered asking yourself, “How am I participating in my own suffering?” Many times the journey of healing starts with acknowledging your involvement in holding onto pain, trauma or disappointments outside of your control. The good news is that understanding your involvement in this cycle, also gives you a sense of power that you have the ability to end it.
Reflection is going to be crucial during this time. You have to take a moment to be honest with yourself while considering your thoughts and your behaviors. Identifying these patterns will help you break the cycle of self infliction. Breaking this pattern will take practice and it will take time, so give yourself grace in the process. Also, develop new habits of practicing self compassion. Learn to treat yourself with the same kindness and forgiveness you give to a close friend. This practice will eliminate your negative self talk and help you foster a healthier self-image. Speaking of negative self talk, I challenge you to pay close attention to the words you use when you describe yourself and your abilities. If a negative phrase or thought arises, simply challenge it. Ask yourself, is this statement true? Is this thought a fact or is it me forcing my feelings to create a reality that isn’t good for me? Challenge every thought and replace them with something that aligns with your true value and the way you want to see yourself. I’m going to be honest with you, this is not going to be easy, so seeking help from a professional may be necessary. I have been in therapy for more than 4 years now, and as life continues to happen to us all, a mental health professional will be able to equip you with tools and resources that will keep you on track with your goals. I hope this helps!
Love & Light,
Ash
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